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I’m having a hard time finding good, clean...

Resolved • Response time 7 hours 8 minutes

5 Mar 2013

I’m having a hard time finding good, clean Indian jokes!!! (The India in Asia, not American Indians) I need 2-3 jokes that are a combo of funny, understandable by kids/adults and politically correct. Know some good Indian jokes… Ideas???
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5 Mar 2013

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Counselor's response
6 Mar 2013
Adjunct Professor
1) The maharajah of an Indian Province issued a royal decree. He ordered that no one was to kill any wild animals while he was the country's leader. The decree was honored until there were so many Bengal Tigers running loose that the people revolted and threw the maharajah from power. This is the first known instance of the reign being called on account of the game. 2)[THIS ONE MAY BE OFF-COLOR BUT NOT IN ENGLISH] = A saadhu (saint) and a shikaari (hunter) meet in a forest. The shikaari sees a bird and shoots. He misses and exclaims: "Behanchood! I missed". The saadhu says killing animals is wrong as it is and using dirty language when not succeeding makes it worse. After some time the shikaari sees a deer and shoots. He misses again and shouts: "Lund saalaa! phir sae missed" The saadhu warns him: "If you use such crass language again. I will call upon the Gods to curse you." This time the hunter spots an elephant at ten meters range. He shoots and still misses and cries out: "Gaanduu! Missed even this." The saint loses his tolerance and prays: "O God. This man has sinned thrice in front of a saint, despite warnings. Take him away." "Thooom!" There is a lightning bolt from the sky and the saadhu is vaporised. Awestruck, the shikaari looks towards the sky and hears a thunder "Bhoonsadiwaalae! I missed too." 3) Bantu returns from his first day at school and immediately questions his father." Dad, today we had a Spelling Class - All the other kids could only say half the alphabet, but I knew the whole thing. Is that because I am Sardar?" "No son, that's because you are intelligent. " Bantu seeming content with the answer, asks his father another question, "Dad, today we had Math class - All the other kids could only count from 1-10, I could count from 1 to 20. Is this because I am Sardar ??" "No son, that's because you are intelligent," replies his father. Happy with the answer, Bantu poses another question to his father, "Dad, today we had Medical Examination, all the other boys were shorter than me, I was at least twice their height. Is that because I am Sardar ??" The father replies, "No son, that's because you are 31 years old." 4)Herolal is driving down the Delhi-Amritsar highway, when he spots Bhola standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that Bhola is just standing there, doing nothing, looking at nothing. Herolal gets out of the car, walks all the way out to Bhola and asks him, "Excuse me, what are you doing?" Bhola replies, "I'm trying to win a Nobel Prize." "How?" asks Herolal, puzzled. "Well I heard they give the Noble Prize to people who are out standing in their field." I hope you enjoy. Namaste Elliott, MAE, LPCC, NCC, CCMHC
6 Mar 2013
Counselor's response
6 Mar 2013
Thank you so much for the kind rating. Here is a bonus for YOU. A monk was driving in India when suddenly a dog crosses the road. The car hit and killed the dog. The monk looked around and seeing a temple, went to knock on the door. A monk opened the door. The first monk said: "I'm terribly sorry, but my karma ran over your dogma." You have to be in the mood for that one. Cheers, Elliott
Adjunct Professor
Avg. question only $24
6 Mar 2013
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